What is – is what is happening now.  Its the present moment.  What was is the past –  Its what has already happened. What shall be is the future  – and it has not happened yet

What is happening now for me at this moment is that my wife desires a divorce. I am considering her happiness as well as that of myself and our children. We have been married for almost 18 years, and while the last few have been challenging my mindset has been to try to work it out. Her mindset is that she is ready to move on and has a strong need to establish her own life and identity. I have to accept that because her feelings are real and I value them.  I am also thinking of our children and that I desire them to grow up knowing they are loved and not at fault for our problems.

I had allowed my past pain to trigger my ego and as a result the frustrations in our marriage made me angry. I know this is part of her reasons for wanting divorce. At the same time  she too has a past and it affected her behavior. I cannot change our pasts, or her way of thinking. But, I can change the way I act, and react.

It was a long process (6 months) that included forgiving my parents, myself, & my wife.  In addition I asked for forgiveness from them. It was like peeling the layers of an onion, and yes I did cry. For each pain that I removed (feelings of resentment, lack, anger, frustration) I created new space and filled it with love, compassion, acceptance, and peace. Now, I am a new man.

I still have a divorce to go through, but my mindset at present will enable me to do it with love.  I know that sounds a bit strange, but its true.  I really want us both to be happy.   I know that getting divorced with love will only serve to facilitate us working together to raise our children with love.

The divorce will be the end of my marriage but the beginning of something new.  A life filled with peace and love.

I do not know what the future will bring but I am manifesting love and am confidant that I will be be happy and that my children will grow up loved and well adjusted.

I know what I have learned about myself and about life will enable me to have a loving relationship when the time is right.

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