Those of you that have flown on a plane may remember that in the fight attendants briefing its said… in the case of an emergency put on your oxygen mask before helping others.  That message can be applied to everyday life as well.  You have to help yourself before you can be of service to others.

What I am saying is that you have deal with whats happened in your past in order to be effective in the present.  Once you are truly living with peace and love, your ego will not influence your thinking and you can listen to others without judgement.  In this way you can benefit others.