Archives for posts with tag: society

What is it that makes someone hate another? Is it the result of rejection, frustration, and fear?  Does it come as a result of social pressure,  our upbringing, religion, personal beliefs, prejudice, or could it be that we inherit it from our parents, the media, or living environment?  What is it about hate that some people are unable to get over the past, forgive others, or themselves?

Could it be that our ego feed the hate and gives it power over our actions, emotions, and behavior? Does this in turn generate a feeling of strength, and self importance?  Why does hate have the ability to keep people from learning and practicing forgiveness, or prohibit people from listening to another? And why can hate so effectively cloud ones judgement, and capacity to know right from wrong?  What is it about hate that when attempts are made for conflict resolution they are sen as personal attacks?  How can one overcome hate and learn to live with love and peace?

Some people say that seeing a therapist  is the best way to overcome hate.  While this is indeed effective it requires time and money. Others say turning to religion is the best way to concur hate.  Turning to god works for many people and should not be discounted as a valid technique it does not work for everyone.

I am not a priest, rabbi, monk, nor am I a trained therapist. I am just an ordinary man that has hated, and experienced hate. What worked for me was making the decision to study spirituality,  living in the now,  and a myriad of other self improvement books. I took from them what made sense, and then devoted time time looking within myself. I made the decision that I would get off the hate train as it led to nowhere I wanted go.

I believe with all my heart that if a person makes a decision to quit hating and start loving, they can do it. All that is required is conviction, faith, belief, hope, and learning how to control their emotions and most important their ego. Letting go of the past, learning forgiveness, practicing surrender, loving oneself, are key elements of the process.  Forgiveness has two elements.  First is forgiving yourself, and second forgiving those that you feel caused you pain, anxiety, frustration, and feelings of rejection.  The truth is when true forgiveness is given hate disappears.  In its place you will find, peace, love, and happiness.  Is that not what we all want in our lives?

Like a river that flows through calm water and challenging rapids, people go through easy and hard times.  That is life.  But like in a river that has turbulent water, eventually the current changes, and calm waters are found.  If people can let the past go and learn forgiveness, and stay present in the moment they will lie a life of love and peace…..

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Many people are afraid of change. They are happy with the status quo and do not want to test unchartered waters.  They know the problems they have, and think it’s better to deal with is known rather than the unknown.    Sound familiar?
The truth is that without change we stagnate.  Doing the same ol same ol, is like going in circles.  You are busy doing, but never arriving, and always end up right where you started.  That is hardly a recipe for success or a fulfilled life. In a way it is like living in the past.  The personal and emotional  issues you have are like a still pool that lies adjacent to a flowing river.
The truth is people need to grow to thrive.  That does not mean one should plunder ahead with care free abandon. Rather it means one should evaluate where they have been, where they are now, and where they want to be.
So take some time and look backwards.  Determine what action, behavior, and attitudes you have that work, as well as those that don’t.  Keep the things that serve you and get rid of the things that don’t.  In some cases past pain might be lingering in your heart and subconscious mind and these emotions resurface when you get angry, frustrated, let down, rejected, disrespected, feel loss or lack, e.t.c.. This can only impact your current relationships in a negative way.
Remembering the events that caused the painful memories is the first step to letting them go. As the memories surface, recognize them, thank them, then release them.  This means you must forgive yourself and or the persons that caused the pain in the first place. We all experience these emotions as they are part of what it is to be human. That does not mean we need to hold on to them.
Once the negative emotional baggage is gone there is space for positive emotions and memories to enter.  These emotions will serve you well and only enhance your current and future relationships and behavior.
When negative thoughts and memories don’t influence your behavior, your able to live in the present and act and react in ways that swerve your higher self and the higher good of all you come into contact with.  This is a refreshing and wonderful change and allows one to live with love and peace rather than frustration and anger.

It is normal to feel emotions like frustration, fear, resentment, and anger when life circumstances threaten your happiness or status quo. You cant mange other peoples actions or behavior but you can manage yours.  Let the feelings happen as they are natural. Honor and observe them and then let them go. Do not hide them away in your heart and mind as these feelings will surface later and your ego will amplify them in order to create drama.

The current of life brings change and challenges but in order to live with peace and love, you’ve got to go with the flow.  Accept what is. Surrender to what is real. Only then can you react in a manner that serves you well. Negativity begets more negativity. Love creates love.  Let compassion, peace and love guide your actions and behavior you will be much happier.

This is an important concept to wrap your head around and I write about it frequently.  This is not  just because of what I feel or what is going on for me,  but because of what I witness going on around me.  Living with love and peace is far better than living with hate and anger.

In this journey of life there are many lessons.  Among the most important is forgiveness.  It is not an easy concept to actualize as our ego thrives on past pain, turmoil, conflict, fear, lack, heartbreak, rejection, disappointment, anguish, and anger.  The feelings and emotion stem from our childhood, life circumstance, behavior, divorce, illness, social interaction, and expectations that were not met.  Our subconscious mind uses these feelings as fuel to dictate negative thoughts about others as well as ourselves. As a result many people  suffer. Negative emotional baggage affects behavior and the mind of the individual as well as society.  This is evidenced when families and siblings fight amongst each other,  school year fights, married couples get divorced, the abundance of gang wars, as well as wars between countries.

The process of forgiveness starts with within.  In order to live with peace and love, we must all learn to forgive ourselves. Only then can we forgive others.  The process of forgiveness demands self and societal introspection. We must acknowledge the past pain, and forgive it. Once done we can truly be at peace.

Take the time to inventory what past pain you carry beneath the surface. Item by item forgive yourself for the situation, the person that caused the pain and for whatever pain you may have caused. This is a cleansing process that removes negativity and makes space for positivity.

The process works and can bring peace to individuals as well as societies around the world. Through forgiveness hate is gone, and peace thrives. No matter what race, religion, color, sex, age, or language we all want the same basic thing – to live in peace and love our families and to be happy.

Indeed forgiveness requires effort, belief, action, and faith. The reward is peace and it so worth the effort.

So take the time to forgive, you will be glad you did.